Greetings, loyal blog readers. Or at least to those of you who are still out there! It's been far too long since I've posted anything and there are some serious cobwebs up in here. First, let me address something and then I'll tackle the housekeeping issues...
Friends, family - I owe you an apology. I have not been a diligent steward of this blog that I know many of you were using to stay updated on what's going on here in the Smith world. Not only did I pull a disappearing act, but I left no note, no explanation for my self-imposed exile. So for that I do apologize. Here's the deal.
I'm not one for New Year's resolutions. But the start of the year happened to fall around a time when I was mentally prepared to make some changes in my life, not the least of which had to do with my health. No need to worry - I didn't have any health scares or major issues or anything. But one look in the mirror and I couldn't deny that I wasn't taking care of myself the way I needed to be. And 20 months out from having a baby - it's kinda hard to blame it on just the baby weight! So I took a step back and realized that I was trying to do too much. Trying to be a present and involved mom and a patient and loving wife. Trying to be an effective and enthusiastic co-leader for my Mothers & More chapter. Trying to be a loyal and trustworthy friend to an ever-growing circle of women. Trying to start a business correctly and indulge my passion for photography. And trying to blog about it all at the same time. I was exhausted and was leaving no time for myself and my health. Something had to give.
So...
Since I can't give up being a wife or a mom (nor would I want to!), my friends are what keep me sane and my term as co-leader isn't up until March 31st, what I had to temporarily sacrifice was the time I was spending on photography and my blog. It truly was that, a sacrifice - I get so much joy from creating photos and sharing them with all of you. Though I love being a mom, photography was giving me a sense of purpose outside my life as Natalie and Jacob's mom. It made me feel like I was contributing something to other families and, let's face it, I enjoyed being acknowledged for the work I was doing. But I was just putting a tremendous amount of pressure on myself to get the images perfect, to get my wording perfect, to find something to talk about that people would want to read, etc.
So I decided to shelve the blog for 2 months. And, until this past weekend I did NOTHING photography related - no photo shoots, no editing, no research, nothing. I just couldn't dedicate the time to that because I had so many other things going on. Primarily, I used that time to rededicate myself to my health - I joined the Y, changed my eating habits (goodbye Mountain Dew and fast food!), joined a website called SparkPeople.com where I can get support and inspiration from other people trying to reclaim their health and have already lost 11 lbs. On most days I have more energy, feel better about myself and know that this it what my body deserves and what it needs. I really feel like I'm in a groove and that this has just become my new way of living. But it was not easy at the start and took most of my free energy just to keep my head above water.
So now that I've established some healthier habits and something of a routine, the beginning of March signifies for me the next challenge - finding balance. I enjoy having this blog, so I don't want to give it up for good. But I'm also trying to put less pressure on myself. I'll admit - I was letting myself get frustrated by the lack of feedback I was getting. Here I'd go through all this trouble to actively seek out things to share on here, but it seemed as if I was speaking to no one. **Crickets** But during my hiatus, I thought about why I started this blog and what I hoped to get from it and it occurred to me - this was supposed to be primarily for myself and for my friends and family. Not necessarily for thousands of other readers! I've been comparing myself with bloggers who've had their blogs for 5+ years. AND, I've been comparing myself with bloggers who blog FOR A LIVING. In other words, they get paid based on how many people visit their site and how many comments they get on any given post. And that was never what I set out to do. So I need to stop comparing myself to others and just do what I want with this medium. And focus more on making it interesting and useful to my friends and family than to the public at large. So that takes some of the pressure off for sure.
So the next few posts will likely be pretty crazy - I'll catch all of you up on what we've been up to in the last two months (lots!!) and hope you'll continue to check in as 2010 progresses. We've got a lot in store in the coming months...
- We're going to Walt Disney World!
- Once my term as co-leader is up, I will officially be launching Stacy Smith Photography, including coming up with a logo, designing a website, taking business classes, booking clients (I've already got 7 clients booked for 2010!!), etc. This should be a fun and interesting journey!
- I'm also signed up to do a photography class this summer and can't wait to see what kind of improvements Karen Russell will help me make in my photos
- Brian and I are taking couples trips to Chicago and Amelia Island, FL
- We'll be catching the U2 concert in East Lansing!!!
- I'm going on two girls weekend getaways to Traverse City & NYC
- And I signed up to do this crazy Warrior Dash - I'll tell you more about THAT later, but I get exhilarated and terrified every time I think about it!
Lots to look forward to and get excited about!
So thanks for checking back in and I hope you'll join me on our next adventure!! (Oh, and maybe, just maybe, you'll consider leaving a comment or two if you like what you see - it's nice to know that you're all out there!).
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